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Inside My Hoop

I bought my first hoop on Memorial Day weekend 2011 at an unschooling conference.  It was a beast, at 54″ in diameter and heavy as all hell. At that time I really didn’t know the scope of what was happening in the hoop community. I just knew I had a friend who was in my eyes the best hooper in the entire world and I wanted to try it out. I didn’t hoop with it at the conference AT ALL.  I let a few others try it out and I watched, knowing I couldn’t hoop with it just yet.  I brought it home where I felt safe, to look like a complete ass.  It didn’t take too long to realize that something I couldn’t do when I was child, I could do now! 10 minutes of practice and I could waist hoop with the best of them!  That giant heavy hoop was the KEY to my success.

At first I just sort of played with it. I hooped all over the house and the yard, often being silly and having contest with my husband or children. There’s a rather classy photo somewhere of me hooping with a giant spatula in one hand and a margarita in the other.  Then… I learned a trick and it was all over.  Throughout the next year and half I became inseparable with my hoop. This piece of plastic brought me more joy then anything I can ever remember.

With every new trick I learned, or every movement that felt right I gained a sense of accomplishment I’ve never experienced before. The important part?  The rules are my own. I hoop WHEN I want, and HOW I want. I have no expectations of my learning or my skill level. When I’m inside my hoop the all of the shoulds and have tos and need tos just fall away and I am happily, perfectly me.

Before my hoop, I was very much too shy to show up to a group trip or a group of hooping strangers.  Now, showing up and looking like a complete ass while trying something new (in public) is one of the best parts of it!  My hoop feels like the doorway to finding myself and it just keeps spinning in all the right directions.

The Story of a Shaved Head /hair

I haven’t blogged in ages.  I haven’t really blogged as a big part of my life in years.  I haven’t written anything at all in awhile, and I certainly haven’t written anything down before 10am.  This isn’t my big, “Hey, I’m blogging again!” announcement.  This is just too crazy not to blog.  While lying in bed last night I kept thinking about what I was going to write today.  I couldn’t stop thinking about this whole experience in the third person.  Like I wasn’t even the one doing it.

My entire life people always told me things like, “I wish I had your hair.” and “You are so lucky to have a head of hair like that.”  I have very fast growing, thick and strong hair.  It doesn’t mess easily and is somewhat bedhead resistant.  Still having so much hair is a lot of work, the washing and the brushing.  Ugh.  So what’s the problem?  Well, I never really appreciated it all that much.  When it was long I sort of felt like a slave to it.  When I was older, same, it was just too much work.  I became the queen of the knot.  The ultimate in motherhood anti-style.

At a time when there seemed to be some sort of female head shaving revolution on my facebook news feed, my hair was long.  Very long.  I knew I wanted shorter hair, but still didn’t have the gonads for “boy cut”.  I suppose even then I knew I wanted one, but just wasn’t ready for it.  If you know me, you know I don’t do anything until I’m ready.  Whatever that even means.  I had TJ tie my hair into a ponytail and cut my hair.  I rocked this cute longish A-line for awhile.  This was my short haircut.  In a flash, my high maintenance hair became…  SOMEWHAT high maintenance hair!  And really, super cute.  I loved this haircut, for a while.  Then, it was boring and too easy to tie back every day.

I went to the local stylist in January of 2012 and had her stick to the same cut, but even shorter.  I didn’t really like it.  I’m sure it was a nice cut, but why is it that almost every time I go to a stylist I’m not entirely happy with what happens to my head?  I think there’s only one person who cut my hair that I was really happy with.  (Yeah, Brookie!)  Though, it’s probably my control freak tendencies.  If I fuck up my hair I can rationalize the shit out of it.  If someone else fucks up my hair?  It’s not even rationalizeable at all.  It’s a bad haircut.  (Totally, sorry to all my hairdressers who may or may not be reading this.  It’s all my fault.  I’m a terrible client.)

I decided I needed to go for it.  I’d thought about having short hair all my life, but afraid of not looking like a girl, afraid of not being pretty.  What the fuck is that?  Afraid of not being pretty?!  Like, pretty is some sort of requirement to being human?  It makes me cringe just writing it.

 

So with TJ’s help, this is what I ended up with.  I love this haircut so much.  The entire time I had that cut, I felt like it was the cut I was meant for.  Like I should have come from the womb, with that exact haircut.  It’s the best haircut I’ve ever had.  It’s fierce, badass, but still cute, girly, pretty.  Shit.  Not what I was going for.

 

It wasn’t enough.  I needed to go further.  I needed to experience having no hair.  I needed to challenge every standard of hair styled beauty I’ve ever known.  I needed to challenge traditional standards of female beauty and society’s gender standards.   I needed to love myself with or without my hair.  I needed to not think about whether it was pretty or not.  I’m sure this is the haircut I’ll go back to in a few months, but for now I’m rocking a crew cut.

If you’ve always had a lot of hair, and you’re wondering if it’s as hard as you think it is to shave all your hair off, the answer is Yes.  Yes it is.  There is one thing I’ve pretty much always had, bangs.  And one thing I’ve had for a very long time, pink hair.  Shaving just the top of my head still felt I was shaving all hair I ever had, off.  When I turned off the clippers I realized it wasn’t the clippers causing vibrations in my hands.  I was actually shaking.  I shaved from the back and moved forward until I has once tiny piece of my pink bangs left, then…  gone.  I totally felt a huge surge of adrenaline which immediately exhausted me.  I hopped in the shower for the most GLORIOUS shower I have ever taken.  (Fellow head shavers totally know what I’m talking about!)

I feel naked, completely exposed, vulnerable and I’m transitioning from noticing my hair, to noticing my face and trying to love what I see.  When I wanted this experience I really had no idea what I was in for.  It hasn’t even been a day and I feel like, it’s been just that, an experience!

TLDR: I just really wanted to know what it was like to have a shaved head.  Now I know.

 

Gluten Free Strawberry Cream Cheese Cupcakes

This blog post is being resurrected from July 4th 2010.  It’s one of my all time favorite cupcake recipes and I wanted to come back and tweak the instructions just a bit.  Phoenix, my youngest has been playing a cupcake maker app on Enrique (that would be my iPhone, Enrique.  He has a name). Yesterday he came to me and said, “I want to make house cupcakes!  So after realizing he didn’t want them to look like a house and he wanted to make them IN the house, we did!  I really wanted to go with a 4th of July theme here, but obviously I wasn’t getting past choosing the papers.  Phoenix had some pink and blue sprinkles in mind.  Hope you enjoy your holiday as much as I enjoyed baking these!

Happy Independence Day America!  I could say Happy 4th of July.  Sure, it *is* the fourth of July and all, but I think it takes away from the meaning of this holiday.  Not that I don’t love beer and barbecues, but we should all remember why this holiday exists in the first place.  Today we commemorate the adoption of the Declaration of Independence.  Therefore, declaring independence from the Kingdom of Great Britain.  How to best celebrate this great historical event?

With cupcakes, duh.

Gluten Free Strawberry Cream Cheese Cupcakes
 

Ingredients
  • 1½ cups rice flour (white or half white and half brown)
  • ½ cup sorghum flour
  • ½ cup potato starch flour
  • ¼ cup tapioca flour
  • 1.5 tsp baking powder
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • ¼ tsp salt
  • 1 tsp xanthan gum
  • 2 cups sugar
  • 6 tbsp cream cheese (softened)
  • 1 stick butter (softened)
  • 14. oz strawberries (pureed)
  • 1½ tsp vanilla
  • 2 eggs
  • 8 oz. cream cheese (frosting)
  • 1 sticks butter (frosting)
  • 1 tsp. vanilla (frosting)
  • 2 cups confectioners sugar (frosting)

Instructions
  1. In a large bowl combine the dry ingredients. Rice flour, potato starch flour, tapioca flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, and xanthan gum.
  2. In a medium sized bowl beat together sugar, cream cheese and softened butter until crumbly.
  3. Add sugar mixture to dry ingredients, mix together.
  4. Add strawberry puree, vanilla. Beat for 30 seconds.
  5. Add eggs. Beat on high for 2 minutes. Fill lined cupcake pan.
  6. Bake at 350 for 20-25 minutes. (cupcakes are done when you can poke it with your finger and have it bounce back)
  7. To make the frosting, beat together the 8oz. cream cheese, 1 stick softened butter, 1½ tsp vanilla and confectioner’s 2c. sugar until smooth.
  8. Frost completely cooled cupcakes.

Below is the original photo I took in 2010.  We made these colorful strawberries to go on top!  The berries are simply dipped in melted white chocolate than in colored sanding sugar or sugar crystals.

Happy Independence Day!

Couch to 5K: Week 6 – Running Maintenance

Awhile back I promised to write a little bit about the problems I’ve encountered while running and how I’ve dealt with those issues.  I um…  procrastinated and um…then kind of forgot.  Shocking, I know.  But today, a friend wrote to me on my Facebook wall and it reminded me that I really wanted to document all of this.  So here I am!  Documenting.

I think the first thing to know is that the internet is your friend.  There is NO END to resources out there.  I know you’re probably thinking, “Um duh, Heather!”  I think my very favorite way to learn is though a very basic form of crowd-sourcing.  I LOVE posting a question or problem on my facebook wall and seeing the variety of answers and ideas.  Real experiences are so much more valuable to me than textbook cases.  So, hopefully some of my experiences can be helpful too.

I’m having trouble with my lungs can not seem to get a deep enough breath. I don’t smoke or have many allergy problems, also & this maybe a question for a doctor, today my knee & neck randomly started hurting after my run. Last I am looking for a new pair of shoes, just wondering what you run in… thanks again

Breathing: The first few times I ran, I DIED.  I mean like crazy heavy breathing that left me feeling more winded than anyone in there right mind would want to be.  I attributed it to being a beginner and just kept on.  One problem for me is I HATE feeling like I can’t breathe and when I am winded like that I tend to panic, only making the whole situation worse.  I knew I needed to relax and when it didn’t improve much, I started to wonder if I was breathing incorrectly.  As it turns out I was doing it ALL wrong.

First things first, breathing in through your nose and breathing out through your mouth doesn’t count for running.  Nose breathing isn’t going to get you enough oxygen to carry you through your run.  The idea is to breathe IN through your nose and mouth at the same time getting as much oxygen as possible.  Take breaths from your belly, these are deeper than from your chest.  Then breathe OUT through your mouth.  Every so often I also exhale quite forcefully to rid my lungs of excess CO2.  If my lungs are holding any CO2 then that’s space where oxygen can’t be.  The other biggest help for me was keeping a steady breathing pace, rather than breathing erratically.  This took A LOT of practice and didn’t come naturally, but once I got it…  I got it.

Livestrong has some great advice on breathing.  Although at this time I find trying to follow a 3:2 ratio is unreasonable for me.  I also breathe quite loudly and the article suggests I shouldn’t.  I believe this is partly a beginner problem as my lungs are still adjusting and strengthening.  When I run I do seem to get a little winded within a few minutes, but as long as I practice what I know about breathing I do level out and hit a point where I feel like I could run forever.  (That is IF my calves would hold out!  All in good time I am sure)

Knees: I have experienced some sore knees, but this was not until after I ended up with nasty shin splints.  What I learned from friends and articles was that sore knees can be due to a tight IT band.  So I began some stretches that were directly related to that.  Also, I  used advil to keep inflammation down and ice for 20 minutes ASAP after my run.

Neck: I really have no advice here.  Although in the beginning I did have some neck trouble.  I have a large chest.  It took awhile for my neck to become accustomed to the new activity.  I don’t mean running.  I mean the bounce CAUSED by the running.  I have the sports bra of steel…  but still.

Sneakers:  I was wearing these.  But after a few weeks I realized that they aren’t made for feet.  They are terribly stiff and too narrow in the toes.  I very quickly hated them.  Now I wear these and I’ve been love from day 1!  These are a minimalist shoe and really do make me feel like I’m barefoot.  Honestly, I haven’t had any knee pain or shin splint pain since I started wearing them (this may or may not be a coincidence since I put all the work in to get rid of those issues).  The biggest differences I notice is 1. comfort level and 2. my feet are working harder so they were more tired after a run the first 2 times I wore them.  I’ve run in them 3 times, so this all has plenty of time to change.  Also I bought a half size up in my running shoe.  I am normally a 6.5, but I bought a 7.  Feet swell during running and you need room for that in your shoes.

I think the very best thing that I’ve done for myself is maintenance.  Running is really hard on the body and can require a lot of maintenance work.  Especially in the beginning.  Every time something comes up, I research the heck out of it and deal with the problem immediately.  For example, when I began an old painful hip injury resurfaced so I looked up hip strengthening exercises and within 2 weeks I was pain free in my hip.  When my neck was sore, I found some stretches for sore necks and did them faithfully for weeks.  Same with my shins and my knees.  I’ve also recently started doing yoga from runners.  I hate yoga.  Errr…  I hated yoga.  Now I look forward to it and know that it is helping me.  In the long run (no pun intended) all of this is paying off and means I can run farther and actually feel good about it and not like I’m about to die a thousand times over.

As someone who hated exercising on purpose, I can truly say that I look forward to our runs.  5 weeks ago, on day 1 of Couch to 5K 60 seconds of jogging left me completely winded, but 2 days ago I ran for 20 minutes without stopping!  (Woot!!!)  It’s a big challenge and you CAN do it, but you HAVE to listen to your body and take care of it when it needs you to.  When I wanted to start running the maintenance part didn’t really occur to me.  Now I like to think of it as working out the kinks.

Happy run/walk/jog!  How are YOU doing?

(Have more advice?  Post it in the comments!)

Pad Thai Day

We’ve been doing the Couch to 5K program about 3 days a week.  1 of those days always lands on a Friday.  At our house Friday is known as Pad Thai Day.  I can’t even imagine a better post-run dinner than Pad Thai.  It’s one of my favorites and I almost always order it when it’s on the menu.  I promised the recipe last blog post and I’m usually not to good on keeping promises over the internet but this time you can say, I delivered!

I had never thought of making my own Pad Thai before.  There is a take out place here that makes it decent enough so I just bought it from them once in awhile.  Occasionally the chicken was overcooked, but it was cheap, abundant and saved me from cooking dinner for at least 2 nights in a row.  It was a win-win.  Of course until we ordered food one evening and Tj found a chopped up cigarette in his food.  Oh, how I WISH I was joking.  We have never been back since.  How does that even happen!?  Did it fall from his mouth?  Behind his ear?  Was he chopping vegetable while smoking AND blindfolded???  Do I even want to know?!

Anyway, I searched around for a recipe and eventually came across one that I thought matched perfectly.  Most of the recipes are similar, but something about this one just stood out.  Full Disclosure: This isn’t my recipe but I’m rewriting it since there are some mistakes in the text and I modified it just ever so slightly.  Also, on the original when you click for the photo version it’s different.  So here is the recipe that I cook every Friday night.

Pad Thai
Recipe type: Entree
Serves: 4
 

Ingredients
  • 8 oz. Thai Rice Noodles (linguini style)
  • ¾ tbsp. tamarind paste
  • ¼ cup warm water
  • 2 tbsp fish sauce
  • 1 tsp chili sauce
  • 3 tbsp brown sugar
  • 1½ cups chicken thigh, sliced
  • 3 tbsp soy sauce or Bragg’s liquid amino’s
  • 1 tsp corn starch
  • 2 tsp coconut oil
  • 4 cloves garlic, minced
  • 2 fresh Thai chilis, minced (optional – these tiny chilis can pack some heat!)
  • 2 tbsp. chicken stock
  • 3 cups bean sprouts
  • ⅛ tsp ground white pepper
  • 3 green onions, sliced
  • ⅓ cup fresh cilantro, chopped
  • ⅓ cup peanuts, chopped
  • fresh lime wedges

Instructions
  1. Bring a large pot of water to a boil. Remove from heat and place in the rice noodles. Allow noodles to soak while you prepare the other ingredients. (The idea is soften the noodles enough to eat without making the mushy. I find this step happens quite fast so check regularly) Drain. Rinse with cold water. Set Aside.
  2. In a cup dissolve the tamarind paste in the warm water. Add the fish sauce, chili sauce and brown sugar. This is the Pad Thai sauce. Set aside.
  3. Stir together the soy sauce and 1 tsp of corn starch to make the marinade. Pour over the sliced chicken. Stir well. Set aside.
  4. Heat the oil in your wok or large frying pan over medium-high. Add the coconut oil. Stir fry the garlic and chilis for about 30-45 seconds.
  5. Add the chicken to the wok and stir fry until brown on all sides. Pour in the chicken stock and continue to the cook the chicken until cooked through. 5-8 minutes.
  6. Add the noodles to the pan, pour the pad thai sauce over the noodles and mix with the chicken. Gently lift and turn to mix the noodles with the chicken. Stir Fry for 1-2 minutes.
  7. Add the bean sprouts and the white pepper and continue to lift and turn to mix in with the noodles.
  8. Removed from heat. Add the green onion, cilantro, and peanuts and toss together until well mixed.
  9. Serve with lime wedge and chili sauce. Also, add more fish sauce to taste if desired.

Notes
Instead of chicken try shrimp or tofu!

 Before I go, I should share that on Saturday we attended a film festival at the local theater.  There were 29, 1 minute videos entered and  I should probably also mention that one of the videos happened to be made by Skylar and his friend Charlie.

This is his second movie screening, at a real theater, of one of his own videos and all I can say is what an amazing experience for him as a young film maker. All of the videos appear here at The Vashon Line.  Skylar’s film, entitled “God” is the last one on page 2.  I can’t even tell you what a thrill it is to see your kid’s face on the big screen!

 

Cto5K Week 4: Making Serious Progress

Today wasn’t the best day on earth for self-adoration.  Then 6:00 came and TJ and I headed out for our run/walk/jog that I talked about last week.  When we returned I was bragging ALL OVER THE PLACE about my performance.  I fucking rocked it.  Like a boss.

Week 4, Day 1 of Couch to 5K looks something like this:

  • 5 minute brisk walk
  • 3 minute run
  • 90 seconds walk
  • 5 minute run
  • 2.5 minute walk
  • 3 minute run
  • 90 second walk
  • 5 minute run

I wasn’t even sure I wanted to move on yet.  I had almost convinced TJ that I wanted to repeat another day from week 3.  Then at the last minute I just said “oh whatever” and went for it anyway, because I’m either cool or stupid like that.

Today, we tore it up!  Errr…  *I* tore it up!  Not only did I complete the day with ease, but I added a 90 second run to end of program and could have kept going! For reals, yo!  TJ just barely managed to keep up with my lightning fast pace!  (That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!)

I can’t even tell you how hard the first 3 weeks were.  I have dealt with what feels like NEVER ENDING problems in only 27 days.

  • Edema in my legs and feet
  • An old hip injury resurfacing
  • Shin splints
  • Sore knees
  • Neck problems
  • Panicky breathing (while running)

I know that there are a lot of us beginning new exercise programs right now.  It IS spring after all.  So I’ll write about each and every one of these issues and how I’ve dealt with them in another post.  Hopefully, it will help someone out there.

This whole program was beginning to make me feel weak and *GASP*, old.  I’ve already spent WAY too much time being discouraged.  However, I’ve spent an EQUAL amount of time dealing with EACH ONE of these issues properly and it has paid off.  The progress I made today totally trumped my piss poor attitude this morning.  Today, I felt like a machine!  A machine that has two heaping portions of homemade pad thai (recipe to come IF you beg for it), a slice of homemade pizza and a ginger ale and whiskey to top it all off.

 

She Runs

I’m eagerly awaiting my husband’s arrival. After he gets home from work, we’re going for a run. Yeah, you heard me right. Miss I don’t like to exercise on purpose is going for a run. Actually, more like a jog. Or maybe a jog/walk. Really, it just sounds so much cooler when I can smugly say, “yeah… I’m headed out for run.” And stretch my elbows back with overzealous pride.

Here I go.

Today begins 3 weeks of Couch to 5k. The program I’ve been hearing SO MANY people love and have success with. What kind of success, you ask? Running success. Meaning they don’t rage quit or bust a hip or swear off running for the rest of their existence. These people actually end up liking running! Imagine that. By the end of the program they can actually run a 5k. Total superheros!

So, I’m feeling out of shape. Yes, I know ROUND is a shape. I’ve heard that joke before, hardy har har! Not really the shape I’m going for, though neither is square or um, triangle. Actually, since we are not in preschool let’s not talk about shapes at all. Really, what I’m going for is more energy. Currently, I cannot outrun my husband. This means I get hit with the water balloon EVERY time. Dodge ball? Forget it. While I can throw a head shot with pinpoint accuracy, getting out of the way is just not happening. I get hit in the boob EVERY time. Though, that may have nothing to do with my speed. :/

He is sweet to run at my pace.

So… anyway enough chitter chatter. Here is what we have done for 3 days a week so far.

Week 1:
Brisk 5 minute walk
Alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for 20 minutes.
PIE! Well, not exactly, but I made it and it felt GOOOOOOOD.

Week 2:
Brisk 5 minute walk
Alternate 90 seconds of jogging and 2 minutes of walking for 20 minutes

My experiences are varying. Week 2, day 2 I *dramatic pause* DIED!!! However, I kicked SO MUCH ASS on day 3! Today we begin week 3, where one of the running stretches will last for 3 whole minutes, a freaking eternity. Holy Mary Mother of God. Help me, Jesus.

Week 3, Day 1 complete. I'm ALIVE!

A Sticky Situation

It’s taken me a long time to love Seattle and the PNW.  I mean REALLY love it like it’s home, which it is.  It’s taken me a good couple years to settle in and to feel completely at home.  So now I want to see more.  So this spring and summer I’m making it a point to explore the shit out of this place!  I’ve seen the Space Needle, that’s not what I’m looking for.  I wanna see the weird stuff, and incidentally the sticky stuff.  Our first stop was Pike Place Market.  We’ve seen the market before…  old news.  Instead we went below the market to Post Alley which happens to be home to the second most unsanitary tourist attraction just behind the Blarney Stone.  The tradition began in 1993, though it became an official tourist attraction in 1999.  That basically means they quit trying to clean it up.  If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em right?

 

Architectural Gum

Seattle Gummed Window

An Epic Fashion Journey (that’s not over yet)

I left the house at around 1pm yesterday and didn’t return until about 9pm.  I was gone for 8 hours.  Shopping.  Shopping is hard work.  My pits were super stinky by the end of the day!  Next time I’ll need to bring wipes and deodorant.  I never knew the power workout that is called… shopping.  Without realizing that the shopping mall is indeed a very fancy place, this is what I wore:

Most of the women in the mall, (or at least the ones I couldn’t help but notice) were wearing fancy shirts, skin tight jeans, high heels, and tons of makeup.  By the end of the day I think they might look even better then when they started!  I mean, if you’re into that sort of thing.  I have to hand it to them, I barely made it down to the ferry terminal in my boots once I realized how sore my muscles were.  We brought new meaning to the words “shop till you drop”.

I used to HATE shopping.  I would last maybe 20 minutes to an hour TOPS.  Then all the energy would drain out of my body and I would start yawning and become basically unresponsive.  It was a similar feeling to sitting in a high school desk for an extended length of time.  Total lack of energy and the only sound I could utter is, “Ugggghhhhhh”.

I’m not sure if I was ever fashionable in my life, by any standard really.  I remember always being uncomfortable in just about anything I ever wore.  I can specifically remember my first independent fashion choice (by independent, I mean not based on anyone’s opinion or style).  It was 9th grade.  I had taken a trip to a mall out of town and purchased a really cute floral, stretchy skirt.  I got it home and realized that the purple in my skirt was the very same purple my newly purchases and daring high top chuck’s were made of!  Oh.  Oh yes.  It was on!  The next morning when I got up for school , I got dressed before breakfast because I was so excited about my outfit.  Skirt, socks, purple hi top chucks.  Squeeee!


It felt gooooood to be me.  It felt gooooood to stand out.  I felt sassy and awesome.  It was an outfit I was going to love, forever.  I felt powerful for the entire morning!  I went to French class where I admired my legs sticking out from under my desk.  I loved French class, but I hated French.  I loved going to class because my Junior boyfriend’s locker was on that floor and right across from my class.  I saw him through the window and as soon as the bell rang I went to him; as I did every Tuesday and Thursday of every week.  His friends were on either side of him; a very after school special-ish scene.  We talked, though I can’t remember what we said and then his friends went off to class.  He stayed for a moment, looked me in eyes and said, “Oh and by the way, don’t EVER wear anything like that again.”  Then he walked away.

*CRUSHED*

Crushed isn’t even the word for it.  My bubble popped.  My world crashed.  My heart broke.  Everything changed right at that moment.  Everything.  I loved him and it was the beginning of a very long downward spiral for me personally and for my fashion sense.  Obviously there were other issues in my life as to why I felt the way I did, but this was a turning point for me, and not a positive one.  I never really got it back.  I mean I tried a lot of different styles on and I wore a lot of different clothes, but I never really got that feeling back.  Then exacerbate the problem with 3 pregnancies plus an ever changing body and that spark I felt when I put something on that I liked, loved, ADORED…  was completely extinguished.

Until very recently, that is.  It’s funny how people are often thinking the same things at the same time, because right around the time I started to really care about my clothes, my friend Tiffani wrote this super inspiring post.  She’s doing a 52 week series on getting acquainted with yourself that I highly, HIGHLY recommend.  I don’t always do the challenges, but this one I sort of did by accident.  I’ve been making it a point to love myself more.  (The past me has major, GINORMOUS issues with self-love.)  Part of showing myself some love is paying attention to how I feel in my clothes and getting myself some threads that I really just want to be in.  It’s a slow process, I don’t know how I could replace my wardrobe all at once, though it really does need such an overhaul!  I need more time!  However, after our EPIC shopping trip this weekend, I feel pretty awesome to have come home with a few more pieces that I love.

It’s funny how not too long ago stepping out in those socks would have been too much for me, but now I just love wearing them everywhere.  I love bringing color back into my life.  I spent a lot of years dressing in mostly black and being enveloped in color is really making me happy.

It doesn’t make any sense to judge clothing based on your negative view of yourself.  If you love it, if it speaks to you, then make it work and allow yourself to feel fabulous in it.

Label Shoppers: Gettin’ All Fancy Up In Here

Have you ever read a wine review?  No?  Me either.  Well, I mean except for a quick description of something on wine.com.  Even then, I didn’t REALLY read it.  Even so, I’ve always wanted to write a wine review series for people like us: label shoppers.

Isn’t it weird when the waitress allows you to test the bottle first. I mean, It’s wine.  I’ll take it.  Does anyone ever REALLY send it back? Have you ever seen someone swirl their wine around and study the glass with first their eyes then their nose?  I have.  It’s weird and I have no idea what they are doing other than trying to make me feel less refined than I already am.

Here at Eclectic Reality we strive for fancy.  If we’re going to be fancy then we need to learn how to review wine.  That is why I downloaded a wine review guide to help us along.  We are fancy people.  No…  we epitomize fancy!

*****

(All the photos I took of us were pretty much black.  That’s what we get for not wanting to get up and turn the lights on.  If you don’t know what we look like, you get to imagine two people having this conversation.  If you do know…  well, lucky you.)

TJ: I don’t even know what we’re drinking.

Heather: We’re drinking wine, hunny.  [reading the wine guide on iPhone] I think you should cleanse your palette.

TJ:  I’m cleansing my palette with this cold piece of bacon that the kids didn’t finish earlier.

Heather:  My palette is already cleansed, I’m three glasses in.  So, if we follow the guide I just downloaded then we should probably mention the name of the wine.

TJ:  [Holds the bottle in the air and attempts to make sense of the label]  Bookmark is made here in Washington and it is a red wine.  That is exactly what is says on the bottle.  This always makes me feel like it is made up of all the leftover merlot, cabernet, and syrah that didn’t make the cut.  It ran me about $10 per bottle, and tastes like a sweet deal.

Heather:  That’s kind of expensive for wine don’t you think?  Whatever, we should probably move on.  The guide says we need to talk about the color.  Is it red?  Is it purple?  Maybe brick?

TJ: [holds up glass to the light] We’re in kind of a dimly lit room.  I can’t tell.

Heather: Um…  maybe it’s the jelly jar you’re drinking it out of?

TJ: It’s a pretty dark purple to my eyes.

Heather:  Again… jelly.  [rolls eyes] Whatever, just smell it.

TJ:  It smells like fruit and alcohol to me.  Actually, I don’t smell anything.  It might be a rare odorless red.

Heather: Oooh.  That makes it more expensive.  Expensive wine is better.  Like most red wine, it smells like rotten fruit to me.

TJ: You’re so unsophisticated.

Heather: I am so fucking sophisticated, you have no idea how sophisticated I am! Whatever dude, we need to talk about the texture.  Did you know wine had texture?  It says to think of milk.  Milky… wine?

TJ: Medium.  I’m going with medium.

Heather: It’s kind of winey.  Not unlike yourself.  The guide says we need to aerate the wine.  Swish it in your mouth and suck air through your pursed lips.  GO!

TJ:  Mmmm Hmmm.  Definitely getting wine on my shirt.

Heather:  My turn.  I can’t swish and suck at the same time!

TJ: That’s what she said.

Heather: *cough*  *choke*  *gasp*

TJ: What’s next?

Heather:  Hey, I’m OK.  Thanks for asking.

TJ: What was the purpose of the swishing and sucking?

Heather: I have no idea.  Let’s finish this up.  Its says “a wine finish is the lingering sensation that wine leaves in your mouth after you swallow the wine.  The finish is described in both length and flavors”.

TJ: *blink*

Heather: *blink*

TJ: So…  how long was your wine?

Heather: I don’t know.  How long was YOUR wine?

TJ: You know…  if I skip brushing my teeth, I bet I can still taste this in the morning.  Whatever.  I’m going with medium.  Medium is my answer.

Heather:  I don’t know if I can handle being fancy.  I’ve never thought this hard about wine.  Now I’m supposed to explain what it pairs well with? [changes to a mid-atlantic accent – think Frasier Crane] It pairs well with a wide array of cured fatty meats and orangish cheeses.

TJ: I’m feeling like our review is a tragedy for Bookwalter Winery at this point, which is a shame, because for $10, I feel like I’m drinking at least $15 or $20.  If you’re like me, and rarely spend more than $10 on a bottle of wine, buy this wine and you will thank me for it.  It’s really good.

Heather:  Wow, this review sucks.

TJ: [furrows brow]

So I guess at this point we’re questioning whether we should be reviewing wine at all.  Is this series even worth it?  This all makes very little sense to me.  Is there a learning curve?  Will I just magically “get it”? Oooooor…  is it a sham?!  I guess there’s only one way to find out.  We be gettin’ get all fancy up in here!